It is my birthday. So therefore it is time to check in and summarize what I learned since last year.

The biggest thing I learned was to double down on my commitment to avoiding toxic people. The second thing I learned (or re-affirmed, because at this point the lessons are the same you just keep learning them in new ways) is to guard my schedule with my life. All things being equal, time is the only restrictive asset any of us have. It’s also important, I have found, to schedule time for myself with no agenda.

Finally, I have been taking an unabashed honesty approach to relationships with other people that has worked really well. At some point this year I stopped trying to change the terms of relationships with people according to what I think would make them work better, and just accepted that I’d rather lose a connection with someone than have the connection based on a dishonest foundation. People will just have to take me as I am or not take me at all. And, of course, on the flip side, it’s not worth trying to change other people. Take them as they are, or don’t take them at all.

There are enough new friends in the world out there who won’t need to change their world for you, or visa versa. Go out and meet them.